When It All Crashes Down [Kris]

[Kristopher Roberts]

Kristopher sighed softly, using Augusta as his new matress and pillows. Resting right on top of Augusta was prehaps one of Kristophers more happy moments. The boy might have muscles like a rock, but he was warm and comfortable.

He snuggled in closely, merely listening to the boys heart. The rythum was soft and easy, putting the blond at ease. Kristophers fingers dragged down softly to rest on his chest near Kristophers face.

Blond hair trickled over his shoulders and spilling around the two in a strange curtain effect. With the blankets pulled up around them, it made Kristopher warm again. His poor cold toes started to heat back up. He should of dried his blond head before coming home, but he didn't think about it.

Kris shifted lightly on Augusta. His brain was trying to think of something to say, something to do. But nothing came to mind.

"You're warm." Talk about a random and stupid statement.

[Augusta Davingoun]

Augusta felt safe here, he felt like nothing bad had ever happened to him. It was these moments with Kris that Augy felt like he was normal. All he wanted t be was normal, he never wanted anything more than Kris to be happy and him to be normal. He wished he was home, if he had met Kris he could have helped him and brought him back to the estate and they would be wealthy and happy and safe. But his past, it was so blurry lately. He had been here for about 18 years, he barely remembered the estate, he could remember the piano in his room, his mother in the kitchen with the maids, her giving him milk and homemade cookies after a long tutoring session. He could remember spilling the milk on accident and his mother would scream and throw pans at him, throw the milk carton and yell. But right now, Kris and this warmth was better than money, better than fame, better than anything in the world. Augy would give up that life of riches and popularity for Kris. He'd give away everything for Kris.

"You're warm."

Augy looked down at his fiance with a soft smile. He trailed one hand from Kristopher's waist to his neck, then let his big hands run through Kris's slightly damp locks. He brushed them to one side, then to the other. He was just mindlessly playing with Kris's hair really, and he let out a sigh that seemed a bit dreamy. " Yeah... You always tell me to get back in bed when I get up too early... " he said and laid his head back, closing his eyes. " You may not be a furnace like me... But you're the most wonderful little blond thing in my world..."

[Kristopher Roberts]

He closed his eyes and let out a content sigh, he loved it when his hair was played with, it just made him feel so much better. It also, made him sleepy as hell, it was such a soothing action that he wished others to do more often.

Slowly, he moved again, his feet sliding off to rest on either side of the older boys legs. Kristopher was getting far too comfortable on the boy. In fact, he was pretty damn sure he might fall asleep on Augusta at any moment. Thankfully, that meant that Augusta could not move and thus could not leave him. That poor fear of his would probably never leave him. Being alone meant no one cared, no one noticed him, it also meant illness and death. Maybe not in a literal sicne, but it was close to death, being alone and abandoned.

A small smile touched his lips, "Hmm, that's because when you leave, you take all the heat with you." He muttered softly as he snuggled with the dark haired boy. A small amused chuckle escaped his lips.

"You should tell me that more often. I like hearing that...even if I am a heat stealer and have cold toes." To make his point more clear, he rubbed his poor toes against Augusta's ankles.

[Augusta Davingoun]

Augusta knew that Kris would want Augy by his side 24/7 now, and for awhile, hopefully once things settled down, Kris would feel more comfortable and everything would slowly slide back into place, Of course Augy knew that was going to take awhile and wasn't guaranteed, but Vasant's return never happening wasn't a guarantee either. Nothing was ever written in stone, Augy knew better, but Augy could at least hope thing would get better. Hope was really all Augy had left besides the blond on top of him. Augy had only Kristopher left, he had lost everything else, even his sanity, his own body. He had nothing besides Kris. Which in turn, made the blond his everything. He knew that maybe even Augy would have a hard time being away from Kris for awhile. He knew it was stupid to think that Kris would just fall off the face of the earth, but he was scared a little bit too. He had been alone, by himself in that dark corner of his fragile mind, and he was scared of being stuck back in there, in the dark, watching the world move around him.

"You should tell me that more often. I like hearing that...even if I am a heat stealer and have cold toes."

Augy whined loudly, " stoooop~ Your feet are freezing!!" he said with a childish smile, Augy had always been the childish one, always silly and goofy. It's been a long time since Augy could act himself, be himself again. When Kris had stopped torturing him he sighed, " Well, you really are the best thing in my world, you are my one and only... I'd never trade you for anything, you are all i will ever want..." he said and smiled, resting his hand on Kris's head lightly. He loved cuddling, he loved cuddling Kris the most.

[Kristopher Roberts]

Eventually, the blond would settle down and be able to get back into the swing of things. But as he is at this point of time, he was far from reaching that point. He was scared of a lot of things, frightened he would be left to die in a corner with no one to be concerned with him. He was afraid he was going to be unloved, that he had no place anymore in this world.

Kristopher had to have a place, a purpose to live. He was a survivor, but one could only keeping surviving for so long and he might of finally reached his limits. Augusta was all he had left, the only thing keeping him together as evil things echoed through his mind.

It bothered him, surely, these weren't his own thoughts and ideas. It wasn't his idea of Augusta only using him and going to be like Naelona. He wasn't going to toss him away cause he couldn't decide on his standings. He wasn't going to throw Kristopher to the wolves because he needed help like Naelona did. Certainly he wouldn't turn away from his touch...because he was different.

Despair spread through his body, he lifted a hand to his ear and pressed down on it. Trying in vain to block out what he felt and heard. All the unknown rage and emotions building up like a volcano.

Squirmingly lightly, he buried his face once again into his lovers neck. "Please, don't ever trade me away." was what he wanted to say but instead he spoke softly to Augusta with a tremble in his voice from with holding these emotions he felt that did not belong to him.

"Why are you burnt?" The red eye glowed softly against the boys skin, pulsating an eerie light that was hidden away from Augusta. "Why is someone hurting you?" He inquired, fisting ball up near his ear.

[Augusta Davingoun]

Augusta felt different, he saw how Kris put a hand to his ear, which he had done before. Augusta wasn't quite sure what that meant but it didn't seem right. It was like Kris was trying to stop listening to something, was it him? Maybe it was something Vasant did to make him cover his ear like that. Maybe Kris did it when he was under stress? Augy had 100 guesses but no real answers. Augusta wished that his life would be just a it easier. He wasn't sure how much stress he was going to be able to deal with before his whole mind just died or exploded or something.

"Why are you burnt? Why is someone hurting you?"

Augusta frowned, " It's the therapy..." he admitted, " sometimes it leaves burns, but as long as thing are okay, I'm not complaining..." but he heard that tone, it wasn't like Kris at all. It sounded darker than Kris, and possessive and everyone knows at Kristopher is not possessive. " There's no need to get angry... hey whats wrong with you?" he wasn't angry he had a seriously concerned tone to his voice as he looked down at the blond resting on top of him. " And whats with your ear? Are you okay?"

[Kristopher Roberts]

Kristopher didn't moved, his fingers curled around his ear and held it. He was trying to block out feelings that weren't his own. This was becoming common for him and he couldn't understand it. He had no idea why he suddenly felt possessive and angry for seeing marks on his lover. But it just sit something off inside of him...something not him.

"It shouldn't leave marks. Stop going...I can get medicine for you. I can even steal if if I have too. Therapy shouldn't be painful...it shouldn't burn. Let me get medicine, I don't want you going back. If it burns, it could kill." His voice ended in a bit of a snap. He didn't mean for it too and maybe didn't even notice it.

Either way, he buried his face deeper into Augustas neck. Suddenly, something snapped back into place and Kristopher felt confused even more. He knew what happened, but he was at a lose. "N-nothing is wrong, Augusta." he spoke softer now, "I was just...upset. That's all." Slowly, he pulled his hand away from his ear that had now turned red from the pressure.

"I'm okay. I'm fine, nothing is wrong...don't worry about it." Was Kristopher trying to reassure his love or himself? He wasn't so sure but he knew something was wrong with him. He knew for a while now but had no idea what it was all about.

Feeling a need for a new subject, "I stole your last white shirt..." And it was currently what he had on over his frail little body.

[Augusta Davingoun]

Augusta was actually really worried, Kris was acting like himself, and he knew how that felt. But Augy was concerned, Kris was acting odd and it was somewhat bothersome. If Kris wasn't feeling good, Augy needed to help him. Augy listened to Kris and then frowned deeply, " I'm already on medication Kris... Jouhnin has been taking care of it, why are you so angry? " he said and then as Kris buried his face he sat up a bit. He held Kris though as he sat up to look at the blond, he was worried, he wasn't sure what to think and then Kris covered everything up, he was saying it was all okay and fine when Augy knew better. Augy knew everything wasn't fine, he could tell just by the way Kris was saying his words.

"N-nothing is wrong, Augusta. I was just...upset. That's all. I'm okay. I'm fine, nothing is wrong...don't worry about it."

Augusta stared at Kris with a look. A look that was concerned but unhappy at the same time. Augusta put his hands on either side of Kristopher's face and moved to were Kris had to look at him. He was worried, and it showed on his face. " Kris... There is something wrong, you never get this angry. And telling me not to worry is like telling water not to be wet, you're not acting like yourself. Kris... What's wrong? Please just... don't shut me out okay?"

[Kristopher Roberts]

"Then the medication isn't working if you have to get burns!"

Kristopher held on to Augusta, he didn't pull away and he didn't even look at the other. He noticed they where moving, Augusta was sitting up. This wasn't going to end well he feared. The boy shook lightly, but blamed it on the cold and having being moved about.

"It's cold." He complained gently as the blankets slid down and off the two once again. Kristopher tightened his hold on Augusta's body. He thought about fighting the older boy so not to look at him. The urge was strong but he decided to let the older boy move his head to face him.

Kris didn't meet his gaze. "I'm not shutting you out, I think I am just...stressed. A lot has happened since you left me, Augusta. I...I just have a few issues is all. But don't pay attention to them, its nothing big. None of it is..." His voice pitch changed slightly, it wasn't much but it was enough to make the blond look at Augusta and then shake his head.

He could hear the whispers again. He wanted them to go away, he wanted them to shut up! He didn't understand what was wrong with him. He never had mental issues before, never had a split personality, he didn't have anything his lover had. So what the hell was going on?

He needed to forget, find a way to ignore it all, just like everyone has ignored him. No one cared not even Augusta even if he gave him that look. It was fake, just like everyone else.

Leaning forward the blond pressed his lips carefully against his fiances. At frist he was afraid and then he just didn't care.

"I just want you to love me, I've missed you...and I've be...lonely."

[Augusta Davingoun]

Augusta was taken back by the snapping Kris did and then ignored it when Kris complained about being cold. Augusta was worried and he was going to make Kris tell him what was wrong because Augy knew better than to believe Kris when he was lying so obviously. Some may have heard that voice and believed Kris but Augy knew better. Augy had been with Kris for too long to think that everything was okay right now. All Augy wanted to do was help but Kris wasn't letting him. Kris was telling him anything and it was worrying Augy more so than normal. Augy felt like Kris was confused and it made Augy confused too, which was upsetting because he needed to know what to do, he needed to know how to help. He just had to figure out whats wrong. He couldn't let Kris feel like this and not do anything. Augy told Kris that he was going to help Kris get better and this was him trying to help.

"I'm not shutting you out, I think I am just...stressed. A lot has happened since you left me, Augusta. I...I just have a few issues is all. But don't pay attention to them, its nothing big. None of it is..."

Augy looked at Kris but Kris didn't make eye contact, obvious sign of a lie. " Kris... Please, this is not just stress. And how can I not pay attention to them? It's obviously big if your snapping at me. You never snap at me... Something's not okay..." Augy was trying to pry this out of Kris and that might not have been such a good idea but Augy would rather pry it out than have Kris go through some sort of horrible issue alone, he wasn't going to let Kris be alone anymore. he couldn't just let whatever was happening to Kris... just happen. But suddenly he was taken off guard, Kris had just kissed him. Which was... crazy... Kris barely touched him after what Vasant did and now Kris was instigating this? Augy was now seriously confused and concerned.

"I just want you to love me, I've missed you...and I've be...lonely."

Augy looked at Kris like he was insane, " K-Kris? Are you... are you telling me to sleep with you because I'm... I'm not sure that's such a good idea..."

[Kristopher Roberts]

Kristopher ignored Augusta, he fully tuned him out. He had too, he didn't know why but he felt like he had to do it. Something didn't want to listen to the other, didn't want Kristopher talking. It confused the blond even more now, not knowing what to do, how to handle the situation. "I'm not snapping." He said under his breath, kissing the older male again. Lifting his hands, he pressed them on either side of the boys neck, thumbs caressing him.

The blond pulled away, looking hurt. He was going to play the love card now. If anything, that would get Augusta to stop asking question. He would stop getting suspeious and pay attention to Kris as being...Kristopher with nothing wrong with him. His eyes moved down and away from Augusta but his hands remained on the others neck. His fingers twitching in hidden meanings.

"Do you not want too?" He asked softly, his experssion showing uncertainy and fear. "I--it's okay if you don't...I mean...a lot of things happened." he paused, his hands slowly pulling away from his neck. "I can understand...you might not want to see me that way anymore...too many memories."

He gulped a little as if he might suddenly cry, though another rare thing for the boy to do. But lately, he had been doing it a lot. "Don't you love me, though?" His bony hands trailed down Augusta's chest like a ghost. "Or...has that changed...and you are just humoring me now because your ashamed of what he's done to me....I just want you to love me. All I know anymore is his touch...I can't remeber yours anymore...and I want too."

Kristopher pulled his hands away from the other now completely, pulling his arms in around himself for comfort. His red eye came up then to glance at Augusta, staring at him.

[Augusta Davingoun]

Augusta was seriously confused now, after everything that happened. After all the horrible things Vasant did, was Kris seriously going to kiss him and tell him stuff like that? Kris should be scared, Augy would have been, in fact Augy kinda was. He didn't want to hurt Kris, especially not like that, not like Vasant did. But what Kris was doing right now was way out of character, it wasn't like the blond at all. But the ay he was rubbing his neck, Augy let out a shaky breath, he was confused but he was still human, and still a guy, and his neck was still sensitive. But of course as Kris started talking, things just seemed to get worse. But the way Kris looked, that fear, and asking him these questions. " No that's not it... I just..." he stopped though as Kris kept talking. He saw how Kristopher looked like he was gonna cry and that hurt Augy bad. But this just didn't seam right, this wasn't Kris at all. Kris would never do something like this, not this soon either.

"Don't you love me, though? Or...has that changed...and you are just humoring me now because your ashamed of what he's done to me....I just want you to love me. All I know anymore is his touch...I can't remeber yours anymore...and I want too."

A shiver ran up his spine as Kris's hands ran down his chest. Augy was shocked at what Kris said, why would he... How could Kris even think that? Augy looked down at Kris with wide eyes, " I do love you and... I... I'm not ashamed... How can you not... Kris? What the hell is wrong with you?" he said as he looked at the blond, completely struck. " What he did to you was horrible and... And I don't want you to get hurt... I can't... Kris, are you really... Do really want me to because I really think you're not thinking right... Maybe you should go to bed..." Augusta put his hands on Kris's shoulders, trying to keep himself and possibly the blond from running off or something. Augy had no idea how to respond to this, and this wasn't Kris at all. Something was seriously wrong, and Augusta could tell.

[Kristopher Roberts]

"The what is it?" he asked with a weak voice, looking down a his hands that now pulled at the fabric sleeve painfully too hard. What was it that Augusta didn't like about Kris? If he wasn't ashamed then what was it? Kristopher slowly bent his knees up to rest under Augusta's arms. Kristopher leaned forward and held his head by his hair. Looking truely defeated and upset from hell.

"Nothing is wrong with me, Augusta. If you love me so much then why don't you show me? How hard can it be? It didn't used to be diffcult for you to hold me and love me." Pale fingers curled through his blond hair. "Everything he did was horrible, but your not him." Kristopher lifted his head slightly and kissed his fiance on the chest. Then he went to small butterfly kisses, "You won't hurt me, you never do and I am thinking just fine."

Hands dropped from his blond locks to rest on Augusta's sides. "Don't you like me kissing you? Haven't you missed me?" Funny thing about Augusta, he said for Kris to go to bed, but they where already in bed. That amused the blond but he didn't let it show.

Tears built up in the blonds mismatched eyes when the older boy touched him. Kristopher looked right up at him, red eye staring right into his very soul. "Or have you found someone else to love during our time away because you can't stand to love me anymore? Is that why you are trying to push me away when I just want to be near you?"

In reality, everyone knew Kristophers standing, he was afraid to be close to Augusta, but at the same time he loved him and wanted to be close. But Kristopher had issues now trying to get over the bumps in their life. So, love making was never brought up by either or them and Kristopher hadn't tried to pressure Augusta, ever.

Until now.