Returning the Favor [Piper]

[Piper Wren]

"I suppose I don't really have a rigid definition of the world. I listen to my gut to tell me what I should do and I listen to my head to tell me if it's a good idea. If you're beginning to second guess yourself, then maybe it's time you gave it some serious thought."

Piper sighed deeply, she second guessed herself constantly. Keeping her secret as she had been for the months she had been here now had worked so far. No one really questioned her sometimes acutely strange behaviours when it came to physical contact and her personal space, they just seemed to think that was just who she was...Piper had left it that way because they treated her no differently from anyone else, she was just another person. Not a woman who had been ruined already and someone to be tiptoed around because of it...because she had been forced to be someone's Whore. The young woman shivered at the thought, when Iugo had threatened to make her like that once again she panicked...there was no way that Piper could ever go back to that.

Not ever.

Right now what she needed was just to have someone there, nothing overly constricting...usually if someone invaded her personal space too much she went directly into panic mode. Even at Christmas when Kristopher caught her under some mistletoe and kissed her for a joke, he was shocked that she had shot straight up the ladder they were using in blind panic. He didn't know...how could he? So Piper had to pretend he simply caught her by surprise, Kristopher didn't need to know there was something more behind it...

Elric didn't need to know either...

Piper shifted closer to Elric and leaned her head on his shoulder, curling up near him in a way which betrayed more vulnerability than she had shown in a long time. It may have sounded pathetic, or at least to Piper it did but right now she needed the comfort on her own terms, that knowing someone was there with her. She was unsure about what his reaction to this would be and prepared herself to move just incase.

"I'm always second guessing myself...I'm sorry if this seems pathetic, normally I'm the one people come to if they need a crying shoulder, not the other way around."

[Elric Vlarintos]

Chaos and turmoil were stirring in Piper's head, but Elric could say nothing more about it. It never left a good feeling when you were questioning your past. Memories of nights spent in the snow kept that knowledge alive and well. They were terrible feelings that he kept locked away for most of the year. It was only once the snow started falling that he started to brood on such things. It wasn't healthy to linger on such dark thoughts for extended periods of time.

It was hard to help someone else deal with their pain, but there was a satisfaction that came with the grim work. At the very least Piper was not outwardly expressive of the pain. She suffered through it quietly and did not push it on others. Elric could appreciate that, but it also meant that she was the person you had to keep an eye on. He heard words from a lesson, nearly forgotten, echoing in his head. "An animal has to be in great pain before it shares its troubles." That's the way nature was; if you showed weakness you were abandoned or killed.

Thankfully humans weren't always like that.

Piper normally kept her distance and Elric recalled the one time he gave her a hug as a way of thanks that she tensed right up. He had barely realized that she had rested her head on his shoulder before she spoke. "I'm always second guessing myself...I'm sorry if this seems pathetic, normally I'm the one people come to if they need a crying shoulder, not the other way around."

She was hurt and needed the reassurances of friendship. This made Elric feel a little awkward and he hesitated for a moment before slowly curling his arm around her back. His hand ended up resting gently just below her shoulder blade. His body was tense and he let out a tiny sigh to relieve a bit of the tension. "It's okay to be human once in a while." It seemed like such a simple statement, but it really said a lot about the way Elric thought of people. The truth was that he had been encouraged to avoid doing such things when he was younger under the myth that real men didn't cry. It suddenly became more noble to wander off on your own and suffer quietly where no one could see, hear or understand your pain.

Watching Piper reminded him that people had the right to experience doubts and to share their pain every once in a while. He couldn't really explain why it should be so, but it felt right.

[Piper Wren]

Despite Elric's gentleness, Piper took in a sharp intake of breath at the initial contact with her back...it hurt if only for a moment before she relaxed. Even if she normally had trouble coping with physical contact, she needed the comfort right now and just to know that someone was there. Unbeknownst to Piper, Elric had picked up on her behaviours, unlike other human occupants of Wonderland she didn't broadcast her feelings or have a dramatic breakdown. She kept it to herself and acted like everything was fine. Now that Elric had caught onto this it would be harder for Piper to hide things, most people never noticed if she was keeping something under wraps...Trying not to think about that, Piper closed her eyes briefly, glad for the reassurance that Elric's precense brought her rather than a rising panic that someone was getting too close.

"It's okay to be human once in a while."

Piper glanced up at Elric when he said that...it was an interesting statement but being too human here wasn't good for you if you wanted to stay alive...and relatively in one piece. There was too much proof of that in so many of the humans and Piper felt like a walking exihibit of that now. The second she let down her guard, this was what happened. It always seemed to be that way, learning to dissaccociate from herself had saved her sanity and help her bear through the worst of experiences. But the pain of having her fingers snapped one by one meant she couldn't this time.

"Maybe you ought to take some of your own advice..."

[Elric Vlarintos]

He felt her shy away from his touch once again before settling down. Elric never really bothered to think very hard about why she did such things. She might have been bruised in places that she didn't show him, but she had done it once before. The best thing he could figure was that she disliked physical contact and that was the cause of her reaction. He didn't consider that there was a cause behind the cause. Some words were best left unspoken and some thoughts were best left unexplored.

It was at that moment that it registered in Elric's head exactly how tiny Piper was in comparison to him. Some slaves were very small (it was a rough lifestyle that discouraged slaves from growing large), but Piper had been a later arrival. It seemed like a terribly odd thing to notice and he said nothing about it. If there was something he had learned from meeting Kristopher it was that talking about how small people were made bad conversation.

There was skepticism apparent in Piper's eyes as she considered what he had said. Elric could admit that it sounded pretty lame as far as advice went, but sometimes it was hard to convey what he really meant. Being human meant making mistakes, and mistakes were not something you could afford to make many of in Wonderland. Hordes of the voiceless and lifeless were a silent testament to that simple fact.

"Maybe you ought to take some of your own advice..."

Elric smirked a little bit at that. It was just enough to let Piper know that he saw the hypocrisy. "I'm working on it a little bit at a time." Why was it that Elric had to work at anything? Objectively speaking it might have seemed like he had weathered his stay at Wonderland much better than most slaves could have hoped to. Adjusting to the world had been his way of coping with all the shit that had been thrown at him and to endure the mental hardships of his labor.

"With the right people in the right places, it is possible. Friends are a worthwhile risk." Elric's voice carried a quivering tone, as though he were trying to say 'trust me'. "The alternative is a different kind of death."

[Piper Wren]

Piper only tensed at Elric's touch this time because it was painful, even if it made her feel a little sick as well...she wanted the contact and the comfort without feeling the rising panic which normally came with it. Once the initial pain had subsided she mostly relaxed against him...Elric's observation about her being much smaller than him was a pretty obvious one. Piper stood at 5.5 tall so she wasn't exactly tall, often she might have been percieved as smaller by the way she held herself...but compared to Elric even without that element in play the physical difference between them was starkly obvious.

'He's giving me that look...'

She couldn't help it when the thought crossed her mind, it was like Elric was trying to block something out of his mind...he hadn't had his own ideas on what had happened to her? The thought of him knowing the details made Piper feel sick, Iugo's threat that no doubt he would have fulfilled had she not got out of there. The thought made her feel hands on her all over again...But Elric speaking managed to drag her mind off those disturbing thoughts.

"I'm working on it a little bit at a time...With the right people in the right places, it is possible. Friends are a worthwhile risk. The alternative is a different kind of death."

That was a slightly different tune to what Elric had played before, it was good to know that he was more open into actually developing friendships with people now. Maybe both of them needed a lesson in opening up, hard as it was. Piper felt slightly hypocritical on the matter herself...there was one thing she would never readily talk about. She quickly pushed that thought away. There was a pregnant pause before Piper gave Elric any eye contact and with hesitation put her arms around him, resting her chin on his shoulder. This was a lot for her, Piper didn't readily embrace anyone on her own terms, she had a couple of times with Augusta and Kristopher but both had been very distressed, enough so she could push her fear aside and focus on them. This was something on her own terms.

"I'll try too...I'm glad you changed your mind."

[Elric Vlarintos]

Time supposedly healed all wounds, but Elric had never felt like it had worked that way for him. All that time ever had done was make the world that bit him years ago seem a much darker place. The ephemeral nature of people had become apparent as he realized everyone was simply struggling to leave behind a legacy. Here it seemed that the attempt to leave behind a worthwhile legacy was simply a futile struggle. Nothing more and nothing less.

Elric had been living in the past and had experienced nothing but despair for several years. There were pleasant moments in his memories, but those stories did not have happy endings. It never seemed fair to move on when everything and everyone you knew were left behind you. It felt like it was time to move ahead once again.

"I'll try too...I'm glad you changed your mind."

Piper still seemed bothered by something. They lived in a world where the very nature was to be bothered. He smirked and nodded in both approval and agreement with her. "It seems I've changed my mind about a lot of things." He looked at her, this time without thoughtful analysis. Instead there was admiration in his eyes.

"I'm glad we're friends," he said. It didn't even bother him the new risks that admitting it created. "It's good to have someone to work on such things with."

[Piper Wren]

"It seems I've changed my mind about a lot of things. I'm glad we're friends, It's good to have someone to work on such things with."

It was nice to hear that from Elric, he had never openly called her his friend before...he didn't seem to do that to anyone. Having friends here may have been a huge risk sometimes, but often it was one of the few things that kept Piper feeling sane. She was also possibly one of the least dramatic out of her circle of friends, and even after everything she had been through she still hadn't gone to anyone for an emotional breakdown. Piper gently pulled back from Elric, her movements still slow and careful, despite this she managed to accidently jarr herself while trying to sit comfortably again. She flinched at the stab of pain, evidence of it crossing her face before she managed to relax again.

"It...it's good to know that you've changed your mind about some things..." Piper let a small smile cross her lips. "Does this mean that you might chance meeting Kristopher again and not have 'You are short' in replacement of 'hello'?"

Piper made a joke? Someone needed to take her temperature, making a joke after everything and with her body currently resembling a patchwork quilt underneath her layers of clothing?

[Elric Vlarintos]

Sometimes Elric felt like he lived in the twisted version of a child's storybook. The world was demented enough that he was convinced that whatever child had to suffer through this book was being given nightmares. Most of the time he felt like whatever he had to say was cheesy or too simple to put into words, but sometimes simple things needed to be declared aloud. If it was not for the sake of others, then it was for his own good.

Separation from the embrace with Piper did not feel awkward, except for when she flinched in pain and Elric instinctively moved to help her. He managed to stop himself halfway through the motion and felt very silly. They were both sitting and even if she had not been there was little he could have done to help without hurting her further in the state she must be in. At least now hopefully there could be some emotional healing for the both of them in addition to her physical recovery. Then again, in a world like this it might only be a matter of time before something else dealt a blow that didn't leave bruises.

It was thinking like that which depressed Elric. He was resolving to try not to think like that quite so frequently anymore. Self defeat might be necessary in front of Boogies, but away from them it seemed excessive. Treating the world as one giant panopticon would doom him to depression and paranoia.

"Does this mean that you might chance meeting Kristopher again and not have 'You are short' in replacement of 'hello'?"

Elric chuckled a little bit through his smirk. "Maybe I will. Hopefully the first impression I left on him won't have left him scarred for life. Maybe I'll track him down when I have some free time." Elric had remembered hearing that Kristopher had sustained an injury, though he wasn't certain if he was supposed to. It had been something of an Ezel affair, and it was hard to ignore the gossip when you knew the names.

[Piper Wren]

Piper saw Elric's instinctive move to help her even though there was nothing he could really do about it, she would be sore until the bruising began to fade and even longer until her fingers were healed. It was nice to know that Elric cared enough to worry even if there was nothing to be done apart from don't jab her...well, anywhere at this moment. Hopefully for both of them this was the start of some healing, both emotional and physical...god knows they could both need it. Piper laid her good hand on Elric's arm when he moved back, looking awkward that he had wanted to help her.

"Don't worry, it's fine...I'm just sore."

It was also nice to know that he was going to attempt getting to know Kristopher again...but perhaps sneaking up on him might not be the best idea thanks to their last awkward encounter. Even Piper had found herself cringing at that point, avoiding that this time around might help them get off on the right foot. Rather than terrify the poor blond. Piper nibbled on her bottom lip, wondering how to state it without knocking Elric's fledgling confidence in approaching people.

"Maybe 'tracking him down' isn't the best plan, Kristopher can get just a little jumpy sometimes...especially thanks to everything he's been through lately. The last thing we need is to have him running for the hills, again...I'm glad you want to try again though."